Family

I have a fairly different view of the world than most folks. I've known this for a while. One of the most obvious ways is my definition of family. In the Mormon religion and culture a huge emphasis is placed on family. Most members have large families. I am an only child so from the get go "family" has been a bit different for me.

But the funny thing is as I left home and explored the world I found there are all sorts of families. I am forever part of the Army family and its roots run deep.

I can find a fellow green anywhere it seems. I'm also part of the American family. I'm probably just fanatical enough in my patriotism to be dangerous. Being part of the Mormon family has been part struggle part blessing for me.

But the best family is my real family however that's a pretty fluid term. I still keep in contact in with several ex-boyfriend's families. I haven't spoken to them in years (or months) but I would I add their family to my handcart when push came to shove. I have friends I would put the bodies through the wood chipper for and gladly hijack a plane for, they are certainly my family.

I have an assortment of fabulous people I rarely speak to for various life reasons but who I know when the zombies come forth they will fight with me to the end. They are my family for sure. Then there are the odds and ends of people I love who don't fit a category but my world would be so much darker without. How can I have a family without them?!  Every family has the green bean casserole on its buffet.

(i'm not naming names but you weirdos know who you are)

And then we have the blood relatives. I've got parents who refuse to pay my therapy bills(hi mom!), a kiddo who may or may be drowned in the toilet before she is grown, assorted aunts, uncles, cousins and such and an ex-husband. Yep, the ex is still family.

See I like the ex. Its why I married him. He certainly didn't have any money. We used to "donate" plasma for money. We were never out of over draft the entire time we were married. I think we were generally about $500 negative every payday. his dad died, L just about killed me and then spent weeks in the NICU. I lost two jobs. Our first year I was in the ICU and almost died. Fun times for all! So after all that how can you not still be family?

We've been divorced a long time now. It's interesting to see the changes and how we've grown. He is re-married and has another daughter. I know the good and bad of being married to him so I often chuckle. I think it is probably harder for her. She isn't American and I know how non-American wives are treated on military bases. I loved being a military wife.

So the ex-husband is forever a part of my family and because of that his wife and other child are too. So to Natasha's family in Russia who are following, Hello :) we're all family here. There is enough love for everyone and I always make too much food. We have games and beds and everyone is welcome :)  I love my family and love adding to it.

Ugh

What an awful day. The cats are going to be buried in the litter boxes and L will be drowned in the toilet shortly I do believe. As you may know I am crazy and in 4 short years will be a heroin addicted stripper. This entire week I have been one nerve away from chewing through my wrist and watching the blood drain out.

This morning L flipped a breaker. When I went to flip it back the lock was rusted shut. Melt down on both sides ensued. Luckily the one person I can always count on to never judge but simply show up and help came through and saved me by grinding the lock off. Bonus points for her because I was all crazy she figured she was cutting off a city lock to re-start my utilities. Even so she just showed up ready to roll. How awesome is that?

Now you may wonder what that has to do with the LDS Salt Lake Temple with Christmas lights picture. Or this one of  L on the carousel at the Phoenix Zoo:

Not a thing actually. But I like 'em. Fun fact, depression used to be diagnosed as "hatred turned inward" pretty apt don't you think?

Here are some fabulous shoes.  Question for you. We Mormons believe that everyone who has ever lived on the earth will be resurrected and have perfected bodies. Question is: will we have belly buttons?  Are they not just a scar from being born here on earth?

I should have uploaded pix from L's first concert. I could offer an explanation but I would consider it an excuse which is probably why I am 4 short years away from glorious heroin. I'll leave you with some pretty pix and  reminder that your belly button could disappear at any moment...

How I Saved Thanksgiving

They look yummy and yesterday they certainly were. But never were they fantastic and today they are really less than stellar.  Overall if I am going to make fresh bread I want it to be orgasmic because that's my reputation. I am not Sara the so-so, I am Sara maker of all things orgasmic!

Its one of the easier recipes I've done and was really quick but in the end was kind of blah. I'm really glad I spaced on making them for turkey day or the peanut gallery would never have let me live it down.

Don't make that bread again!
I haven't made that bread in 5 years!
Well don't try it again! It wasn't very good and you know I don't get fresh bread often.
I promise to never make that bread again.

Nest year when I cook Thanksgiving I'm wearing a cape. On all 4 days it takes me to cook it.

Sneezed Through the Heart

These are the balloons of doom. Michelle gave them to me for my bday. Being the evil cat lady that I am I instantly saw the potential for cat harassment. They were originally tied to a weight but Senor Poppers tried to eat the mylar stars so the balloons were cut free and allowed to roam the ceilings and occasionally chase the cats...

That night Kittenapolis and I were sound asleep when we were scared awake by a very loud noise. I assumed it was a balloon popping. Kittenapolis took off under the bed leaving me wide awake and needing to pee. I decided to take a flashlight on my journey and see what damage had been done. When I found all the balloons intact I was quite upset. If a balloon hadn't popped what was the noise?

The house was in order and I peeped out all the windows to find the neighborhood quiet. I finally decided someone had been shot-because that's what happens in my world-and finally fell asleep.

Last night the mystery was solved. This is Velvet:

She lives under my bed which is why the picture is all blown out with flash. She's actually a total lovebug as long as you are bedridden. Turns out she also has a sneeze that wakes the dead! Holy cow if she didn't have so much heft I bet she would sneeze herself into a wall!  So the balloons are fine, the neighbors are not shooting each other, its just Velvet running into a bit of dust...

I'm just a debit card with a hammer

We played Taboo earlier and the word Laura wanted me to guess was "adult". The clue she gave me was "it's kind of like you but not quite".  Well then.

New Baby

This is the new baby we picked up this evening.  He looked terrified before we got him so we'll see how much more damage we can inflict on the little guy before he heads off to Petsmart. When we let him loose he buried himself in the couch cushions. We all though he was under the couch but I found him with his head buried as far as he could get between two cushions and his little body curled up in the tightest little ball.

Kittenapolis was more interested in the rain outside:

But Senor Poppers was less than amused.  He very much enjoys being the baby and knows while we may say he is the real baby the fact is he is not.

I locked the newbie's kennel so everyone else would stay out the kitten food and litter box. Within 2 minutes Senor Poppers had found a way to scoot the food bowl over closer to the wall to scoop out kibble. I can see I better stock my year supply of cat food...